impatient, obnoxious, petty, argumentative, and obsessed over meaningless details

Monthly Archives: September 2011

how to destroy a bmw

I just got mine back from the Garage. It is 11 years old and every now and again suffers from mechanical faults. The guy who fixed it commented on what good condition it is in, something I am very proud of.

On my way home I stopped in Tesco to do some shopping and some woman parked her 5 year old car beside me. I stared in horror at the wheel. Some others even saw me judging her. I cannot understand how someone can let this happen to a car that is relatively new. What was she doing with the car? Maybe she used it to plow a field of turnips. I wondered if she bought it originally to impress people. Look what happened.

Return of the homeless dude

I know some visitors find this kind of stuff boring but it is what I read about most days.

In the news for two days but I just saw it now:

Rumours abound in Dublin that the Irish central bank is back printing punts just in case the eurozone does break up. And while that may be true, I don’t know, but one would hope that there was some contingency plan in place just in the case the whole euro projected exploded. Then again, given the track record of European policymakers in dealing with the crisis so far, it wouldn’t come as too great a shock if there was no plan B in existence.

I always thought that the people on the old Irish 1 and 5 Pound notes were hobos like the guy who was pan handling IMF Chopra but I was wrong:

This slideshow requires JavaScript.


SENIOR OFFICIALS from the Central Bank have played a walk-on part in the unfolding Greek tragedy, prompting their counterparts in Athens from the wings on how to plot a resolution for their banks.

Performing a role close to that of an all-knowing Irish Oracle at Delphi, two officials travelled to Athens in July and again earlier this month to advise the Greeks on how they stress-tested the Irish banks in an attempt to draw a final line under the banking crisis.

The troika gods of the European Commission, the European Central Bank and the International Monetary Fund have looked favourably on the Irish stress tests as a winning formula for assessing risks in banking sectors in other struggling euro zone states.

The cost of bailing out the Irish banks has not increased since the March 2011 tests, the fifth attempt in more than two years to put a final bill on the banking disaster.

As a result of the purported success of the Irish tests, the Central Bank was asked to send a delegation to Athens earlier this summer to help the Greek authorities handle their own banking woes.


I am doomed

OK, another computer games post. Here goes my entire winter. The beta for Battlefield 3 came out today. Its Bad Company 2 with planes!

I am iffy about playing beta software. I did with one of the Call of Duty and the bugs in that version were horrible.


As Gerry Conlon said: “I’m an innocent mon”:

Idiot Documentarians Reveal “Secret IRA Terrorism Footage”. It’s a Video Game from 2009.
A UK documentary examining possible connections between Muammar Gaddafi and the IRA apparently confused video game play for actual IRA footage of a helicopter being shot down.

In the documentary Exposure – Gaddafi and the IRA, aired Monday night in the U.K., a voice can be heard saying, “With Gaddafi’s heavy machine guns it was possible to shoot down a helicopter as the terrorists own footage of 1988 shows.”

On the screen viewers witness shaky footage of what appears to be a heavy machine gun mounted into the bed of a camouflage-painted pick-up truck. The words IRA film 1988 are displayed over the video. In the footage, viewers see a group of men in balaclavas standing around the vehicles as it fires at a distant helicopter.
“This was what the security forces feared most,” the voice continues. “It may have been a lucky hit, but for the Army and crew once was enough. No one died in this attack…”

That’s probably because the footage actually came from ARMA 2, a tactical shooter released for the computer by developers Bohemia Interactive Studios in 2009.

The mix up was caught by a number of viewers, and ARMA 2 gameplayers, who pointed out the issue on the developer’s website this morning. While the page for the player that lets you watch the Monday night show is still active, the video won’t play for people outside of the U.K.


(Published on: Sep 27, 2011 @ 15:51)

Garda Groper

unrelated photo

A GARDA sergeant appeared in court yesterday accused of sexually assaulting two female colleagues while on duty at a Dublin Garda station last year.

The officer, who is in his 40s, made his first appearance at Dublin District Court, where he faces three counts of sexual assault on dates in March and June 2010.

Judge Bridget Reilly imposed reporting restrictions to prevent the identification of the complainants.

This included an order prohibiting publication of the defendant’s name, place of work and the location where the incidents allegedly occurred.

One complainant has claimed she was sexually assaulted twice, and the other alleges she was sexually assaulted once.

In a summary of the prosecution evidence, Garda Insp James Flood told Judge Reilly that during the first incident the accused had been on duty when “the injured party was leaning over a desk”.

“While she was doing this, it is alleged the accused pressed his pelvic area into her posterior and at the same time placed his hands on her hips and made a pumping motion saying ‘She likes it this way’.”

About 2½ months later, the defendant allegedly sexually assaulted her again in an office in work.

The court heard that: “The accused came up towards her and pressed his left hand to the side of her left breast while saying ‘Wake up’.”

Two days before that, it is claimed he sexually assaulted the other female officer. She had leaned over to place an object in a locker when the defendant allegedly “grabbed the inside of her right upper thigh at the fleshy part, at which she screamed”.

“It is alleged the accused then said ‘I’d say you are some screamer in bed’,” Insp Flood added.

As Brendan Gleeson said in ‘The Guard’: “PC my arse, get back to America with that shit”, or words to that effect.


Dublin fan gets on pitch

He stole a substitute jacket and got on the pitch and into the team photos. I love the part: “at the time I did’nt know what I was doing”

go Island to be sure

Taken by my sister in NZ. Strange people over in Island:

Now I gotta murder da’ murder ta’ get away

I was in harold cross last night when the Gardai called to the door. They were looking for the suspect in the shooting there – a guy got shot at across the road apparently as revenge for a separate prison murder. The Garda was asking if we saw someone on a bike. I said “a motorbike” and he said “no a push bike”. Just as we finished wasting his time his phone started to ring and it was “my lovely horse”. He seemed to be in a hurry to answer it so he left.

bus nazi

I got the bus into the city the other night with some Brazilian friends. It was only the second time since 2004 that I took the bus and it was eventful. One of them was drinking a can of beer at the bus stop as the bus pulled up. The irate bus driver was shouting “no liquids” and two of them were not allowed to get on the bus. One was was not allowed to bring a bottle of water on the bus. I got on and said to him “whats the problem?” – he was mental and said “if they have drink taken I dont have to take them on the bus, you dont have to clean up after them”. He had driven off and I said “they are with me, they are from Brazil and are not going to do anything” (little would he know how they are light years ahead of us in terms of being civilized). He stopped the bus and said “will I pick them up?”. I said “yes”. He changed his mind again and said “no, if you have a problem you can talk to my supervisor at the depot” and drove off. I didnt bother to pay him and went upstairs.

After a few minutes someone was taking a photograph and the bus driver appeared on the stairs. He said “sit down, no photographs”. Then he started harassing someone else at the back saying “do you have liquids there”. The other passenger was just sitting there doing nothing. As he walked away I said “this is a wierd bus”. When we got to the city centre and got off a hipster was getting on board. He had a bottle of club orange however the liquid ban was no longer in force.

The bus was going to Dublin airport and I can only presume he was confused and thought he was driving an airplane. Maybe he was afraid of the shoe bomber. It was most likely someone went to the toilet in the bus earlier in the night. Let us just hope it was a liquid and not a solid.

I saw some of the likely culprits in temple bar. I heard one guy wearing Dublin jerseys shouting “She would get some mickey offa me. Its like a lion bar after looking at her”. He was saying it to his drunken friend who had his face stuck to the window of the elephant and castle shouting “come on ye bayaz in blue” as some confused tourists tried to eat some chicken wings. A classy bunch.

sexy sax man

reminds me of Bill Bailey playing metallica: Read more of this post


Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 37 other followers